Day 13: Know Your Role and No Roll.

Monday, June 13, 2011

WTF Moment: 217.2 pounds

95 pounds left to lose

I rocked out a 7 am Core Fusion class and then started my daily tasks at the office before the rest of the crew rolled in.  The morning was great.  First workout finished by 8 am.  Healthy breakfast consumed.  As 10 am rolled around so did the clouds. 

The day wasn't so great from noon to 7 pm, but I am taking full ownership of my feelings. I should have followed my instincts and sent an email that I wanted to send around 10 am.  I was persuaded not to and was convinced to "blaze my own trail."  If me, as a manager going down in flames, is a trail blazing, then success!  There's nothing like trying to spread your managerial wings and having them clipped with condescending comments.  Know your roll, Ashly.  And No to the Roll! 

My typical behavior after a day of knowing my roll is heading to Crumbs for a 500 calorie cupcake or cupcakes.  Yep, snarfing a few of the monstrous frosting laden domes could keep me at my desk to finish tasks sent from above.  The sugar has a way of numbing my frustration and plastering a glazed smile on my face.  Who wants to be around a frustrated psuedo-manager or staff member?  Not me!  Although I felt defeated for the majority of my desk time this afternoon, I managed to take the eat out of the situation. No cupcakes!  Small change, HUGE victory. I didn't turn to food.  I found my fight, left for my lunch hour (nice application of the previous lesson, right?), and marched to the gym.  I was responding to several blackberry messages and ran into a partner on my way out the door.  I'm sure that I was scowling - that happens when the sugar is missing and before the exercise endorphins kick in.  I ran for 30 minutes and felt a little more zen as I returned to the office.  I put in some more time behind the desk and left at 7:10 pm to head to a yoga class.  Then back to the office at 9:00 for another 90 minutes before I finally headed back to the Heights.  I left today's defeat somewhere on Madison Avenue and found my footing on the treadmill.  Now if the backbone shows up, who knows how the day will go.

Can't isn't an option, so anything is possible.